Wednesday, February 16, 2011

Forced time off

I work an insane schedule. No surprise there. For almost a year, I've basically given up my day off each week to help out at another clinic. Yes, the extra money has been nice, but it's catching up to me in a big way. I'm on my second go round of strep throat in 4 months. So I'm spending today and tomorrow at home until the antibiotics can kick in and I'm no longer contagious. Damn, my throat is sore. I alternate between hot tea and ice cream or popsicles. Haven't decided which one works better to help with the discomfort.

Prior to these two episodes, I'd taken one sick day in 5 years. Not counting pregnancy related issues, which I'm considering a whole different ball of wax. Though maybe less stress and more down time would have warded off preeclampsia as well. Last Saturday was my first day off in 3 weeks. I guess I'm having a bit of personal crisis here. Is this really how I want my life to be? I'm killing myself for a job that is frustrating more often than not. I would love to cut back at work, but don't really have the financial wiggle room to do so right now. We're getting there, but it'll be a year or two before I can really comfortably cut back my hours.

There's no easy solution, just wanted to try and work this out. Every few months, I go through this. Still haven't come up with a fix. Which is annoying. I'm apparently one of those people who complain and never do anything to change. The kind of person that drives me insane. I feel stuck. I know I'd work hard as a physician. It's not the working hard part that bothers me. It's the lack of personal time, that there's nothing else besides the hard work. At least I get a couple days at home to knit, read, and sleep with this little bug. A blessing in disguise?

31 comments:

JennDelage said...

Doc....Jocele...the body flippin' wears down. You know this. You've seen this in me and others. It's no surprise it's happening to you.
Can you go into a different field of practice? Hell, get some women together and shave those alpacas of yours! Make your own business!

I think you're a fine doc. You're MY Doc. And lady, I listen to you. Maybe not visibly apparent, but I listen, and I did hear you mention teaching my spinning??

Take joy in your day off...even if you are miserable. Your strep is a blessing in disguise I do believe....
P.S. Keep writing...it's a good outlet.

JennDelage said...

P.S.
I'm forced to make goals......I propose you make some.....like slowing down just a bit...

Domini said...

So sorry you're sick. Take a deep breath and hang in there!

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